Sunday, November 19, 2006
When it Hurts
I went out for a run this morning. It was a beautiful sunday morning so I decided to run more than usual. And so I did. Unfortunatelly, at one point my left leg started to hurt in the knee area. Knowing that pain somewhere is a signal that something is wrong, I slowed down, stopped and took a 5 minute break. While walking I was thinking: could it be the same with feelings? When someone hurts our feelings for some reason is it a signal that things are wrong? Usually we believe that negative feelings are intrinsically bind to love and it's normal to be hurt from time to time. If we use the running example, the most obvious decision would be to take some time away from the person that tends to hurt us, and this is what people usually do. Then they can 'run' together again. So far, so obvious. Let's assume that physical examples can be related to inner psychological processes. Does taking a break cure the reason for our pain or just its symptom? It's just the symptom and the reason for feeling the pain remains and even though supressed for a while can occur at any time again. So, if we get frequently hurt by someone that would mean that there are some basic discrepancies in our fundamental psychological structures. And taking some time away would just cure temporarily their manifestations, rather than the reasons. So, next time you go out and 'run' together with someone, look carefully for what hurts and what would be the reasons for that.
I went out for a run this morning. It was a beautiful sunday morning so I decided to run more than usual. And so I did. Unfortunatelly, at one point my left leg started to hurt in the knee area. Knowing that pain somewhere is a signal that something is wrong, I slowed down, stopped and took a 5 minute break. While walking I was thinking: could it be the same with feelings? When someone hurts our feelings for some reason is it a signal that things are wrong? Usually we believe that negative feelings are intrinsically bind to love and it's normal to be hurt from time to time. If we use the running example, the most obvious decision would be to take some time away from the person that tends to hurt us, and this is what people usually do. Then they can 'run' together again. So far, so obvious. Let's assume that physical examples can be related to inner psychological processes. Does taking a break cure the reason for our pain or just its symptom? It's just the symptom and the reason for feeling the pain remains and even though supressed for a while can occur at any time again. So, if we get frequently hurt by someone that would mean that there are some basic discrepancies in our fundamental psychological structures. And taking some time away would just cure temporarily their manifestations, rather than the reasons. So, next time you go out and 'run' together with someone, look carefully for what hurts and what would be the reasons for that.
# posted by Iv @ 6:29 PM 
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